Gen Z: The Generation to Put an End to Dating Apps?

By Pamela Gliatis

The other day, I caught up with a girlfriend who is currently single, and we started talking about dating in general. She told me she downloaded a dating app for research purposes for class and deleted it quickly, as she knew she had no interest in using it. This piqued my interest. I asked her why, as I assumed dating apps were how people met people today. “It’s so impersonal,” she replied. “I don’t have issues meeting people as I usually meet someone through friends, at gatherings, or even local spots.” 

While I agreed with it being impersonal, it was also not typical to hear someone tell me that it’s easy to meet people in person nowadays. Was there a possibility that the dating culture was now changing with Generation Z?

Recently, articles from CNN, the New York Times, Time Magazine, and many more have made headlines claiming that Gen Z is ditching dating apps. Although online dating has been around since 1995, nowadays, only 26% of online dating users are Gen Z, according to a 2023 Statista survey. However, according to the Pew Research Center, dating apps are more popular in specific groups, such as lesbian, gay, or bisexual adults, who account for almost 55% of users using dating apps. A study done at Western Sydney University found that dating apps can lead to increased feelings of stress, anxiety, and depression.

 Downsides of dating apps

While dating apps can be a great way to meet someone, they could also be causing more harm than good. First impressions matter. There’s a difference between meeting someone naturally and seeing an online profile that is all fluff and no realness. When that happens, you could be wasting your time going on date after date to find out the person is nothing like their profile or in the initial conversations. There is also the possibility of getting catfished or, even worse, meeting someone who is using dating apps to cheat on their significant other. Another issue with dating apps is that they are notorious for being used to search for casual hookups. This can damper the online dating experience if you want something meaningful.

Another thing that is particularly important to discuss is that dating apps can also be dangerous. A study done by a BYU nursing professor who analyzed the records of nearly 2,000 sexual assault victims from 2017 to 2020 found that 14% of the attacks occurred at the first in-person meeting after connecting on a dating app. Many of these cases also indicated that victims with mental illnesses or other vulnerabilities were targeted. Reading about this study reminds me of shows I watched, such as Dirty John or The Tinder Swindler, both of which I highly recommend watching for young women to educate themselves on the potential dangers of online dating. 

Dirty John is based on a true story of a con man who preyed on a woman in a dating app, at first acting like the perfect man. However, after getting married, it comes out that he’s not who he seems to be at all. Then there are con men like “The Tinder Swindler” who meet and woo women online by presenting a false image of themselves. The Tinder Swindler presents himself as a multi-millionaire with a private jet when, in reality, he is getting money from the women he met on Tinder through his charming ways. Both of these shows can open your mind to understand the many different ways that men or women could try to con someone via online dating. 

Upsides of dating apps 

However, dating apps can be particularly helpful for LGBQT+ adults to meet people. I reached out to several gay friends of mine for their input about their experiences with dating apps, and all of them said the same thing: It’s hard for a gay person to meet people. They don’t have the privilege of not having to question others’ sexuality to proceed to something further, as heterosexual people do. I have always heard online dating stories from my LGBTQ+ friends throughout the years, and the majority of them have found success in meeting their long-term partners, but they have also made some great friends from it as well. It allows you to curate your dating experience to save you discomfort further down the line. 

There are other benefits to dating apps, especially for introverts, shy people, or those who lead very busy lives. It is much more convenient and efficient to swipe through profiles from the comfort of your home or even at work. Another positive part of one such popular dating app, Bumble, has an option on the app that is for friends only which allows you to meet new people to make new friendships. This is particularly helpful when traveling or moving to a new city, allowing you to meet like-minded people in these scenarios. But even for those who are shy or introverted, they can also make new friendships the same way as well. 

Dating tips

When going down the route of using dating apps, Hinge is known to be the app that is least used for casual hookups and more intentional for serious relationships, while Tinder and Bumble are used for all kinds of relationships, but more often for casual hookups. The best thing is to make your profile sound positive and upbeat while stating what you’re looking for. This ensures you don’t waste time attracting those that aren't on the same page as you while attracting a high number of matches. 

If you would like to meet someone you match with on the dating apps, it is recommended to do a video call before agreeing to a date to make things more comfortable and eliminate any possible dangers. Video calls can give insight into the potential date’s personality and allow you to decide further if you even want to meet them or not. On the safe side, many apps have a built-in video calling option so that you don’t have to give out your number. In the meantime, plan a date that works for you in the sense of keeping a first date short, such as meeting for coffee or sharing an app at a busy food spot. These short first dates allow you to meet in busy public places for safety reasons and prevent you from wasting too much time on a stranger while still giving you the ability to quickly decide if this is someone you want to continue seeing. Always meet someone for the first time in a public place, and never go to their home or let them into yours on a first date. Telling your friends where you’ll be meeting your date or even sharing your location is also something you can do to be on the safe side. 

If you don’t want to use dating apps but you would like to meet potential matches to go on dates with, tell all of your friends that you are single and open to meeting any friends they may have in mind for you. Another great way to meet people is finding hobbies you love through classes, groups, or through friends. Oftentimes, there are hobby groups on Facebook, Reddit, or Meetup that organize gatherings and events. There’s always a friend who knows a friend when you focus on doing things that you like, and you’ll attract people who enjoy doing the same things you do. A friend of mine met his wife through a mutual friend from a hiking group meetup. 

The best thing is to do what you always love to do, spend time socializing with friends, and putting yourself out there because you could also meet someone at a wedding, at a party, concert, or even at a coffee shop. You just never know where you could meet your potential partner.

Ultimately, the foundation of living life is human connection. There is nothing like meeting someone and getting to see the person they truly are as you get to know them, whether they come from a dating app or from meeting naturally in everyday settings. I have personally met significant others through dating apps and mutual friends; however, I have found more success in those who were through mutual friends. At the end of the day, follow your gut on what works best for you, and you might be surprised by who you meet along the way.