The Importance of You In Love

When it comes to love, our gut reaction is to say romance takes the leading spot as the prime definition. However, love comes in all forms including people, places, pets, and even perfect bites of your favorite dish. Whether it be familial, platonic, or romantic love, they all have one thing in common: YOU. You are the common denominator in every love story you have experienced, so it is important that you take the time to prioritize yourself as well as the one you love.

As the movement for mental health advocacy grows, so does the understanding of how mental health affects the various aspects of everyday life. Just as there are a multitude of factors impacting your state of mind, the reverse is equally as influential, meaning that your mental health can directly funnel into your treatment of others. When loving someone, there is often a foundation of trust and understanding to uphold the many methods with which you choose to express how much you care for the other person. That being said, you cannot rely on their dedication to loving you to excuse their behavior when it has potentially negative consequences.

Love insinuates the accompanying desire to treat the other person as well as you can manage. You want them to have the best they can get and you don’t want to offer them any less! So, the question arises as to how you can be sure you’re investing the same positive energy you hope to have reciprocated. The answer is simple: turn yourself into an equal priority and value self-love the same way you value caring for others.

Mental Health America, an organization dedicated to collecting mental health data and assisting those living with mental illness, advises everyone involved in relationships to “stay well.” In order to stay well, you must make time and space for you to be your most authentic and great self. Everyone is different, but wellness can look like exercising on a regular basis, taking care of your hygiene, eating well, or taking some time to be alone. In any case, reflect on what you need to do in order to achieve happiness.

As a result of your efforts to maintain your well-being, those around you will recognize you as a source of positivity and love. A frequent misunderstanding in making yourself a priority is where the line crosses from self-care to being self-centered, or not paying enough attention to the people in your life in comparison to yourself. No one wants to be selfish, but a healthy balance of effort needs to be offered to your friends, family, or partner as well as yourself. They love you for a reason. Just as you want to see them happy and flourishing, they want to see you doing the same.

At some point or another, we have all been people pleasers in some respect. In the workplace, at home, in friend groups, or with partners, we run the risk of losing touch with ourselves in trying to keep everyone happy. But what about you? Your relationship with yourself? You deserve to be happy, too, and to take the necessary steps to do so you must be able to draw the line and assess your own needs. Above all else, you must be devoted to yourself. It is your longest-standing relationship since you came into this world, after all.